I never BLOG without a purpose and tonight is no different. I can't sleep which means random things flow through my cerebellum that trigger a response that cannot be described on the screen you're reading this on. There is one big thing I want to tackle right now and that is something that I'm going to have to throw my fellow "man" under the bus for. Let me give you this scenario:
Picture yourself walking through a shopping mall. You're contemplating whether or not to get that sweater vest that has been staring you down in the JC Penny catalog for the past year, when all of a sudden you see good 'ol Pete Klinistone, who you haven't seen since high school! So, naturally, you approach him and introduce yourself to his date (who, on a side note, is way to hot to be dating "Pete meat"). You find out he got a job as an Alligator wrangler at the Washington, D.C zoo and that he and his wife recently bought the rights to the entire Jackson 5 music collection. After making up a few stories about yourself and entertaining your ego, he utters this line: "I'm so happy for you, did I mention that we're pregnant." Of course you're going to act all happy, exchange phone numbers, promise a night where you double-date and play a game of Apples to Apples and eventually be on your way.
I don't feel like we as men should say "WE are pregnant " for the simple fact that, let's be honest, we have it reeeeally easy. We aren't losing our luscious curves, gaining weight (and ultimately stretch marks), or letting a baby grow inside of our bodies. All we do is give our donation to the cause and let the ladies do the work.
I do want to add at this point that it is definitely OK to be happy that your wife/girlfriend/one night stand/girl you don't remember/ girl you thought was over 18/ girl who ended up being married to your bosses godson/ girl who you gave 83 cents to at the store because she was a little short on money and you sensed how awkward it must have been for her/ man you found out actually got a sex change and this is a medical miracle that will probably be published in a medical journal, is pregnant because it is definitely a big deal. All I'm saying is that legitimately as a man we should just take pride in what WE did to make this happen. Let the woman bask in all the glory of being a glowing baby-momma-to-be, and we can sit back and watch her breasts grow a size.
PS: Ashley is not pregnant so don't start that rumor.
No comments:
Post a Comment