New HP

Dear Readers,

Recently, I became computer-less when the freak heat wave of last week caused my motherboard to take a proverbial poop. I cried a little, I sat in the fetal position a little, and I said the lords prayer a lot, hoping that the last 4 years of work would be saved somehow.

Upon calling tech support at HP™, I was put on with this wonderful, English speaking man named Tim. I told my new geek buddy, Tim, what had happened and he was very sure it was the motherboard. Also, he said, the hard drive is most likely O.K., so all I need to do was transfer my old files from my old hard drive, onto a new hard drive in a new computer.

I know you are thinking, "Woah, Dave! Why don't you just send your fact seeking machine to HP™ and let them fix it?!?!" Well, I asked about this and Tim was very sorry that my warranty was up but they would still fix it for a small fee. Any guesses on what the "small fee" might be?
$50-NO
$100-NO
$200-NO
$250-NO
$400-NO
$500-Nope....

If you guessed $786.00, you are correct. That is right, readers; for the price of a new computer, HP can fix all my problems in my old computer and ship it back to me for just 60 years worth of pocket change.

I decided I needed to buy a new computer; I have papers due, homework online due, and readers of my "insert award here" nominated blog to appease. I went to Wal-Mart™ and browsed their selection of computers. I decided, for compatibility reasons, that I would stick with HP because up until this point I have never had any problems with it. I ended up settling with an HP™ Pavillion with some numbers after it.

The story is going great. You're thinking, "Dang, were is the gripe? Where is the part where you get angry about something?" Well, man who has a low view on my personality, it happened when I tried to swipe my credit card. The dreaded letters "D-E-N-I-E-D" popped up on the screen. I know exactly how much credit I have to work with, and I know very well that this purchase is well under my limit, so I get my Black Berry™ out and call my credit card company, Discover™. I was on hold for 26 minutes! How many people, at 9:40 at night, have problems with their credit cards?! After the 26 minutes were up and I could recite the entire on-hold song by memory, a lovely lady picked up. Sandra calmly explained that Discover™ thought someone was using my card fraudulently and they denied it to protect me.

Wow. I'm actually going to end this blog in a happy mood! My credit card company actually cares. I could have sworn by my APR% that they have no desire for me to ever live comfortably, but this company actually does try to protect its consumers. Nice.

Good day, readers